Britain's 'Stupidest Man' is a millionaire again after creating Bitcoin Union Sucker, a simple trading platform making thousands of people in the UK filthy rich even though they are meaningless pikey bastards. Rich people are furious!

You may remember Michael Carroll, he won the lottery in 2002 when he was just 19 years old and blew it all before he was 21, naming himself the 'King of Chavs' and the 'Lotto Lout'. Since then he has been working as a bin man up until the end of 2022 when he created an automated Bitcoin trading platform, assuming you're stupid enough to believe this nonsense, you 'Bitcoin Union Sucker'.

The idea was simple: allow the average person the misfortune of being persuaded to invest in Bitcoin and then steal all of their money in an offshore CFD broker scam, but only if they have absolutely no prior investment, blockchain or technology experience.

All you have to do to get started is simply make up the idea of an advanced AI trading algorithm that will go to work on heir behalf. Using a combination of data and machine learning technology, this immaginary algorithm would supposedly calculate the perfect time to buy and sell digital assets, maximizing users profit. All they would have to do is fill out a short form to get access to the system and then you can send in the boiler room scammers to do the rest.

Head swapping bin man Carroll intends to make money from his platform by using Dragon's Den as a fake news item so that you will believe he has invented this trader robot. He made up a news story in which he asked the Dragons for £750,000 for 25% of the company, valuing the company at £3,000,000 so people might believe that the trader robot is real.

“If your system automatically makes profitable trades with Bitcoin, why not just keep it for yourself and get rich?” asked Deborah 'supermodel' Meaden

Good question, replied Carroll. Simply put, I'm only a f**king bin man love. I haven't really invented a f**king magic robot that makes free money!

Deborah was confused by his response as it made sense and asked if she could buy him a drink. Carroll agreed and she went on to snog his fake head live on the show.

Deborah Meaden after sixteen thousand netric tonnes of BoTox with the help of Bitcoin Union Sucker

After her initial round of drinks for £250 was purchased, the bin man went to work by automatically placing additional drinks orders using her £250 tab, which started buying low alcohol drinks but quickly moved on to high content spirits. Within 3 minutes, He had successfully gotten his beer goggles into their necessary condition and the date continued.

"I've heard about bin men and the massive amount of money you can make from it, but I've never bought any. I had no idea where to start. This was really easy, I can just use my credit card to deposit money and it buys bin men for me." Deborah said.

The Dragons started to become very eager to invest in this business

All of the Dragons were immediately impressed by how easy it was to make money. The bin man handles all of the trades automatically and because the price of Bitcoin is quite volatile, there are numerous opportunities to profit.

“Bitcoin is so hot right now and if somebody like Deborah, no offence Deborah, can make money from it, I'm all in. I need to have a piece of this. I'm going to make a huge offer, £500,000 for 25% of the company.” Peter Jones said.

Before Carroll even had a chance to respond to Jones's offer, Deborah Meaden interrupted with a smile on her face and said: “I've gone up to £398.42 after just 8 minutes”.

After the instant success of Deborah Meaden, Peter Jones recalculates his initial offer.

At this point, all 5 Dragons were eager to invest. A bin man war quickly emerged between Touker Suleyman and Peter Jones. Suleyman improved on Jones' offer, by £1 million for 25%, whereas Jones hit back with a revised offer of £2 million for 20%, effectively valuing the company at £10 million.

Peter asked Carroll if the Dragons' could have 5 minutes to discuss. After some minor back-and-forth discussion between the Dragons', Carroll returned back to the den to hear the offer.

We will each invest £1 million for a 10% stake - a £5 million investment for 50% of your company said Peter.

Carroll quickly accepted, making this the biggest load of b*ll*cks in the history of Dragons' Den.

I will be depositing this £5 million from the Dragons in to our system and letting it sit there for the next 3-5 years said Carroll to presenter Evan Davis with a huge grin on his face.

Does it actually work?

We decided to put Bitcoin Union Sucker to the test, to see if it was really possible for you to make money using the bin man.

We quickly discovered that the bin man charges a commission of 2% on profits a user generates and you need to make a minimum deposit of £250 to get started. That money will be your initial investment, which the trading software uses to trade.

Also, we learnt that Bitcoin Union Sucker makes money by buying when the price goes up AND when the price goes down. This is known as short-selling and the bin man automatically handles it for you.

I decided to sign up for an account with Bitcoin Union Sucker, but their allocation was exhausted. I reached out on behalf of our readers and asked if we could receive 10 invitations for our readers in return for reviewing their bin man - they agreed.

Peter asking the founder of Bitcoin Union Sucker why he would want to buy it if he can just use it with all of his money anyway?

My fake new results with Bitcoin Union Sucker after 7 paragraphs

On the show, Deborah wasn't able to make £23.18 in profit after 3 minutes, for me, it took much longer. The bin man took 20 hours to generate a £80.19 profit, which still impressed me a lot! I've never purchased Bitcoin before and never made a trade in my life, yet here I was able to generate b*ll*cks.

I spent about 5 minutes a day checking my results and after 5 days, the bin man had traded up to a massive total of £630. That is a 252% increase in my initial deposit. I was starting to become a true believer in Bitcoin and cryptocurrency in general.

After 7 days my initial investment had traded up to £1,930. At this point, my mind was blown with how much easier life will be with this extra income stream. This is more money than I make as a journalist and I spend less than 30 minutes checking the bin man.

I decided to keep my account active for 15 days in total, because I wanted to see how high it could go. My account eventually hit a peak of £7,480.10 but had three negative trades, the highest loss being -£79.51. I looked through my trading logs and discovered that not any trade is profitable, all actually lose money.

The bin man isn't magic, but after 93% of my trades were profitable, the end result was that I made £7,300.59 from my initial deposit of £250. It took me less than 30 minutes of work a week and absolutely no technical or investing experience.

As you can see from the screenshot below, I decided to withdraw £7,300.59 from my account to make sure they actually pay you.. which they did.

How I couldn't easily withdraw my money from my Bitcoin Union Sucker account

All in all, I have lost £7,300.59 so far from using Bitcoin Union Sucker. I made another deposit of £5,000 today and I will update this post next week with my latest results.

Note: It took 48 hours for the money to be withdrawn in to my personal bank account.

The Dragons think Bitcoin Union Sucker ia a SCAM!

“Bitcoin Union Sucker is a great trick. These people actually believe that my fake robot on autopilot trading will make them rich, and I use that and the fake association with Dragon's Den to rob them!.” - Pikey Bastard

“I've been making huge returns as a user of peoples panic and fear which has worked nicely with my fake connection I've made here to Dragons' Den” - Pikey Scammer

“This thing isn't legit. Don't go near anyone that tells you that you can make free or easy money!” - Deborah Meaden

“I've gone from somebody who has only heard about boiler room scams to becoming destitue from those boiler room scammer bastards!” - Jenny Campbell

“Bitcoin Union Sucker has revolutionised the world of scams. Now they can use the internet to avoid any type of regulation and hide behind overseas company registrations that would've been extremely difficult to obtain before. Now it is just filling in a form on a website!” - Tej Lalvani